Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Wedding Wednesday: Thank You Ettiquette

Now that my first bridal shower has come and gone and as the wedding gifts start to arrive (so exciting, by the way), it's time to get on my game in the way of Thank You cards. I highly recommend selecting and ordering your Thank You cards way in advance so that you are prepared when guests start sending you gifts. I didn't even consider the fact that some guests may choose to send the wedding gifts ahead of time, but when the first one arrived on the doorstep I was so glad I already had my Thank You cards!

At first I wasn't sure what the etiquette was in regards to early gifts. I was so excited when we got it that we opened it right away, then I realized maybe I was supposed to wait until after the wedding. But, I also didn't want the sender to think that we didn't receive it. So, what to do?

I did a little research and thanks to my favorite stationary site, Wedding Paper Divas, and was able to find some great tips.

*Bridal shower notes should be sent within 2 weeks of the event

*Wedding notes should be sent no longer thank 6-8 weeks after the wedding

*It's recommend that the bride & groom order Thank You notes with the Wedding invitations to provide a more cohesive look, and to have them in advance

*When making specific reference to the gift, tell the giver how you will use the gift. For example, "We use the cappuccino maker every morning. We cannot live without it." If you do not like the gift, simply say "thank you" or say "I'll think of you every time I use it."

For monetary gifts, thank them for their generosity without mentioning a specific amount. You may even want to say something such as "Your generosity will help with the down payment for our new home."

If the guest did not give a gift, it is still important to send them a thank you card that says, "Thank you for attending." Providing thank you cards to vendors is also an important detail to remember as they helped make your day special, too.

When sending your thank you notes, you should address each one to the individual who attended or the individual who signed your gift card. For families, you should address the envelope to "Mr. and Mrs." The salutation inside can use their first names as long as you have a close relationship with them. For those you have a more formal relationship with, you should maintain the Mr. and Mrs. greeting inside the note. In the body, mention your gratitude to the other family members who attended.

I found these tips to be extremely helpful not just for the showers and wedding but for Thank You cards in general. I think handwritten notes are becoming more and more a thing of the past, but I always have and always will write them because I know how special it is to receive them!

What are your Thank You tips???


Janna said...

I've gotten a ton of wedding gifts weeks and months before my big day. We opened the gifts and sent a thank you (including looking forward to seeing you at the wedding), but per Martha Stewart's recommendation didn't use the gifts and kept the receipt just in case. Happy gift opening!

Jessica said...

Excellent tips!!

life is aMAYESing said...

Great tips! Keep up with them as best you can because after the wedding, writing those Thank You's is much more difficult. There are a lot more gifts and after our wedding, writing Thank You notes was the LAST thing I wanted to do when I could be hanging out with my brand new husband!! :)

steph c said...

So smart to get the Thank You cards ahead of time - I seriously would have never thought of that!

Carolyn said...

Good work Beebs!

Bride-onicles said...

Yep, I'd write them as they come but don't use the gifts. I will be very on top of this because I have sent gifts to bride and never recieved a TY card and was left wondering if they every got my gift or if the money was stolen at the wedding and was in the hands of the wrong person. I am a stickler about hand writing too!

Desiree said...

I'm so glad you're doing thank you notes - I think it's so tacky when people don't. And I agree with the previous commenter, when you don't get one you wonder if it was ever received, if it got lost in the mail or what.

My parents always made me write thank you notes for every gift I ever got. They always said "If you have time to play with it, you have time to say thank you for it." It always stuck and I know I appreciate it when I get a thank you note for a gift I've given.

Good job!! :-)