Thursday, September 1, 2011

The End.

Yesterday was one of, if not the hardest days of my life. We closed Coffee Buzz. 

We have known this time might be coming for a while now, since we just haven't been able to get over the hump. We just never turned the corner or got to the point where we knew it would be a success. As my mom said, "it's time to stop the bleeding." J and I had dinner with my mom and step-dad three weeks ago and it was then that we all agreed it was time to move on. These past three weeks have been a roller coaster and I have truly felt every emotion a human can feel....disappointment, heartbreak, excitement, sadness, anger, relief, panic, pride, guilt.......

For the past three years Coffee Buzz has been my heart and soul. I have poured everything in to this business; I worked with the architect to come up with the design, I decorated it, I created the menu, I personally found each one of our vendors and selected our products. This coffee shop is more than a business to me, it's my baby.
I am devastated. I feel like a failure, even though no one is to blame and this is just part of business I can't help but think "coulda, woulda, shoulda." My heart is broken and I honestly feel like part of me has died. It is hard to imagine my life without Coffee Buzz when it's been my entire life for three years.

Though I am sad, there is always a bright side. J and I have put in so many long hours and it as been hard on our relationship having so little time together. I am looking forward to having a "normal" life together. One where we get to have dinner together, or spend Saturday morning in bed or go on Sunday afternoon dates. On those same lines I am so happy we did this together. We grew so much individually and as a couple and I am confident that if we were able to get through the past three years together we will be able to get through anything.

There is so much to be done and so much change happening in my life. I am excited and scared and anxious but I am so proud to say that I did it. I ran my own business. I started something from nothing and while it didn't succeed financially, to me it was a success. We have met some of the most amazing people and have made lifelong friends and we have done something that very few people can say they have done. But now, it's time to close this chapter and begin a new one.


Miss Chelsea said...

I'm so sorry that you had to make that choice, I can't imagine how hard it would be... my mom had her own business so I saw a lot of the struggles, and the time and heart it takes, firsthand! I'm glad to hear you're staying so optimistic about it though!

Jessica said...

Oh no! I'm so sorry you had to close Coffee Buzz. But I hope this opens another door for you and brings you and your soon-to-be hubs that much closer. :)

Corinne said...

I'm so sorry to hear the sad news! I do agree with you in saying that if you and J made it through that, then you can make it through anything! I've never been in your shoes but I have a lot of respect for people who open, work in and run their own business. Although it's sad just remember all the positives you received from the experience!

Anonymous said...

Beautifully said my dear. Mama is so very proud of you.

Café Moka said...

So sorry girl!

Curly Girl Confessions said...

You did it for three years and that's more than most people can say...and coming from a business owner myself, I know how much time goes into it. Move on and never look back! Best of luck on your new journey.

Christina said...

I'm sorry. The good thing is that now you have that experience under your belt. Most successful business owners didn't always succeed financially on the first took many times. Don't give up on being a business owner again someday if it is what you want to do. It's awesome that you guys started and ran this together! Good luck in the future!

Miss K said...

so sorry to hear that, but it's definitely something to be proud of! opening your own business is such an adventure, especially at such a young age AND with your lover. Kudos to you and J for going for it!

Lia Joy @ life is aMAYESing said...

Soo sorry to hear about your business closing. I can't imagine how hard that is. But please don't ever think of yourself as a failure! As you said, you've done something that most people haven't done and will never do. For that you should be proud. Keep your chin up. :)

Kelly said...

Oh Kristin, I'm so sorry to hear this!! :-( We own our own business as well so I know EXACTLY how it feels to be so attached to something you've put SOOOO much blood, sweat, tears, and hours into. I hope you look back on all of the accomplishments you acheived with Coffee Buzz-- Like you said, WHO can say that they've owned and managaged and ran their own company?? I hope you look back on the three years with a smile :-) Here's to even better things in you and J's future!!

Katie said...

Oh my goodness, Kristin! I am SO sorry to hear about this. I would've never wished for the coffee thermos if I would've known :( I just put salt in the wound. I feel terrible. Running a business is so hard and I give you and your soon to be hubs major credit for doing it in the first takes so much drive and motivation! What are you guys doing next? what's the next step? I know it's rough now, but I'm sure there are greater things out there for both of you. I will be thinking of you guys!

Ma Belle La Vie said...

Hello- I've been following you for a little while now and wanted to say I'm very sorry to hear your sad news. Like others have said, this was definitely something to be proud of! Many people aren't brave enough to ever try something like this- you should be proud of yourself. =)

Carolyn said...

I love you Beebs! :)

MIL2B said...

LOOK at your responses/comments... that is not a failure! That is support! From hard working, strong minded, the will to never give up perspective of our younger generation that has had to suffer from our terrible government! You and J have been sooo professional, personable and respectable to the community and everyone who shares this time. You and J have devoted your time and relationship to this, that the economy has hurt the innocent younger, hard working generation. Shame on the the system that is putting the small business down in which this country started. I am very proud of you and J (just like anonymous said). NOW stand up straight and go forward... you can do it AND probably even bigger and better!

Desiree said...

Aw man! I'm so sorry to hear this! I remember when I found your blog and I marveled that 'this young girl' had her own business! :-)

You are most definitely not a failure and I know how hard it must be to walk away from your baby but to keep the doors open for three years is a success in my book! Besides, you've gained invaluable business knowledge that you'll be able to take with you on your next adventure!

Great things are on the horizon for you and this is but a chapter.


J and A said...

You should be very proud of your self, that was a huge commitment. Good for you. Sorry you had to close it though. Hugs.

EmilyB said...

Aw, bummer Kristin. I am so impressed with you and Jason for handling your business so beautifully. All things must take their own course. You are a total success - and the experience you've gained with this will be invaluable to all of your future endeavors. I'm so proud of you!

Jasmine said...

i'm so sorry to read this. 3 years is a really long time to invest in something and you should be proud of the work you put into the place. when one door closes another ALWAYS opens. :)

Anonymous said...

Ugh, Kristin, this breaks my heart. Seriously teary eyed for you. And me, because I hoped to one day come visit your little shop and buy me a latte. I hope that the next chapter for you and J is even better and more successful than this one. Love!


Bride-onicles said...

I'm so sorry you had to close Coffee Buzz, I am sure that was not easy to swallow but you are right, you tried your best and put your all into it, and no one is to blame. All businesses sadly are suffering in this poor economy and its so sad and scary. You two will enjoy having you time again. :)

steph c said...

I'm so sorry to hear you had to close up shop! As you said, at least you had this wonderful opportunity and were able to learn so much from it.. on to bigger and better things, yes?!

Saying I do said...

So Sorry to hear about Coffee Buzz - you are extremely inspirational to have opened your own business at such a young age..I really wouldn't have even known where to begin with that. Having a "normal" schedule with your fiance will def. be better for you both, and you'll look back on this time with fondness, pride, and realize just how much you learned and did take away from the experience as a whole.

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