Thursday, January 2, 2014

Let Go of Something

Honesty time. The week before Christmas I had a breakdown, it was a 20 minute ugly cry breakdown. I was feeling very overwhelmed by making the holidays perfect for my family. I was anxious to get all my gifts purchased and wrapped. I was stressed at work by a potentially huge life-changing client I was on the verge of landing. My house was a pig sty - there were toys EVERYWHERE, laundry EVERYWHERE, and I hadn't dusted in probably three weeks. A little comment made by my husband set me off. It was something so small and so minor, something that shouldn't have bothered me, but at that particular second it was the breaking point.

I took a moment, alone, cried my ugly pity tears and then remembered a post one of my favorite mama bloggers, Erin, from Blue-Eyed Bride recently wrote about accepting the fact that all your ducks may not be in a row all the time and to focus on the blessings you have been given. In the post she said,
"Every day I make the decision to let go of something"
and that really resonated with me. It's a rare occasion that all the laundry is done and folded and properly put away, the dishes are all clean, all the toys have made their way back to their proper place, my hair is done, the fridge is stocked, everyone has eaten a homecooked well balanced meal, etc. etc. etc. The list could go on and on. 

Whether you are a working mom or you stay at home with your little one you have a to-do list a mile long. There is always something I could be cleaning or organizing or throwing out. I probably should be using all my spare time to work out or get my hair cut or eyebrows waxed. I would love to have a delicious completely organic homemade dinner on the stove every night - but you know what?

It's impossible.


I don't care what you say or who you are it is absolutely impossible. It is impossible to have every single duck in a row and still be able to spend the precious moments that go by so fast with your family. Having a spotless house or six pack abs is not what is important in life. What is important is leaving the toys all over the floor and instead snuggling up to my husband and watching a basketball game. What's important is leaving the clean clothes in the hamper for one more day so I can chase my baby girl around the table and hear her scream with delight. What's important is throwing my dirty hair into a messy bun to go somewhere fun and make lifelong memories with my little family.

Of course, this is easier said than done. I can't promise that I will never have another breakdown or that I won't get stressed by the length of my to due list. I'd love to promise that my husband watching football instead of cleaning won't irritate the crap out of me BUT this year, 2014, I am going to really make a conscious effort to "make the decision to let go of something" every day.

35 comments:

Katie @ yellowmangolife.blogspot.com said...

Great post - this is so true and I tell you that the "ugly cry" probably helped more than you know. Sometimes you just need to sit back and realize that every piece of our lives won't be perfect- as much as we want them to be - but we are offering the best to our families that we can. And if housework doesn't get done or blog posts don't get written? So what? There is always tomorrow...or next week. Keep your help up girl! =)

P!nky said...

Oh girlie, I'm so with you and I don't even have A KID! I sometimes get so overwhelmed that our lil apartment gets so messy, because we are so busy. And I FREAK out because I think, HOW can I take care of a house if I can't manage this place?!?!

But like you said, cuddling up on the couch with my new husband is more important than having the living room table clear. I'm treasuring our small moments together, because soon it will change.

Your resolution is a good one and one I know you will rock out. i randomly found this pin today and loved it, so I'm passing it on to you!

You're a great mama and wife! :)

http://www.pinterest.com/pin/64528207135040731/

Jess Beer said...

I just want to reach through the screen and hug you! I'm so with you! It's so hard to let things go...and sometimes we just need a break from it all. Hope you're a little more relaxed this week!

Erin LFF said...

I love this so much! No one has it all together, and I constantly have to remind myself that it's okay! Right now I feel like the biggest failure of a wife/friend/daughter because I've done nothing but work!

{Jessica} said...

Love this post, sweet girl. I have had several moments of near break-downs lately too (I think the holidays brings out the super stress in all of us!) and am having to remind myself daily to just let go of a few things. Because you are SO right - the memories are what is most important. Not having the cleanest house or perfect meals.

Cheers to a less-stressed 2014!:)

Bridget said...

Serious...what is it with men and doing NOTHING while watching football?!!? I just love football, but I can't wait for the season to end so I can have my productive husband back...wait, who am I kidding...what sport is next?!? Bball...nothing will ever get done ;) haha. I'm with you...I've been letting things go knowing I just can't physically do EVERYTHING!!!

Carolyn said...

I LOVE THIS! So true! :) You're doing great Beeb!!! Leave that dusting and go snuggle your family!

~Dawn~ said...

Kristen - this is SUCH a perfect post for me. Yesterday I literally LOCKED myself in the girls' bedroom to clean the crap out of it and organize things without them bothering me. When I was finished (so proud of myself) I moved on to the next room and turned around to see that the girls were in their room making a god damned fort with all their blankets and stuffed animals and everything I had just put away on their bunk bed. I wanted to SCREAM - but, instead just took a deep breath and 'let it go'.

Nat said...

Love this! As a mom I'm slowing learning that I need to let go of things too. That my baby isn't going to care if my hair is done and my makeup is on but would probably enjoy having me sit on the floor longer and play. It's hard not to get caught up in the everything must be perfect mentality that is put on mothers these days.

Celeste Aslanyants said...

Love. Love. Love. Every mom in the WORLD has to feel this way...it is literally impossible to keep up with everything! Of course I want everything to be perfect all the time, but I seriously feel like I'm going to lose my mind sometimes....it's so overwhelming! Thank you for your honestly. Mamas need to hear this and know they aren't alone!

Ashley said...

YES - all of this. Like I said, I love this post! It's such a struggle to be ok with a messy house, incomplete chores, meals without much effort...but it's worth it. They'll never look back and remember how together we had everything, but they will remember how much fun they had with us when they were young!
You're doing a wonderful job, keep it up :)

MIL said...

Hello my darlin! I got home early today because the family I Nanny for has the flu, great ungh? But to my advantage I get to get caught up on your blog! Which I love and I've told you before, you write brilliantly, and helpful info for others AND PRIZES, awesome. My comment to your post today is.... everyone has the emotional breakdown, good for the system, matter of regrouping your system. Communication between you & J is there but women need to explain to men exactly, seriously, they don't get it until you lay it out for them, and lay it out..ha!ha! J would/will do anything for you and YOU are just doing very fine, I might add. All your to do's and resolutions will be met, don't push yourself and be prepared for some ones that don't turn out just quite right. Love you with all my heart. AND my granddaughter, Bailey and J!

Sarah Davis said...

Great post and I think everyone can take a little something from this! Thanks for sharing!

Sara said...

This is a wonderful post and definitely something I need to be better about too. It's hard feeling like you have to do it all (and are the only person that can do it). We put so much pressure on ourselves these days to be perfect. It just can't happen. Or at least not all the time. Something has to be let go. So well said.

Michelle said...

This is such a great way to approach the new year! Being a full-time mommy, employee and wife can often times be overwhelming. I might need to take this approach myself! :)

Courtney B said...

Oh my gosh.... I've been having the hardest time of letting go of stress, letting go of the good memories, letting go of being irritated at my hubs, you name it? I'm having a hard time letting go. THIS IS JUST WHAT I NEEDED!!
This is at the top of my resolution list. Once a day, let something go. Oh how much simpler life will become! And it will help me enjoy every moment a little more!

Anonymous said...

That is great advice! It took me 50 years to get there. It may have something to do my responsibilites changing but I also realize I want a life well lived. xo m

ajs {of MN} said...

what a great reminder!!!

Kristen said...

i loved this post! it's so completely true! there's so many things you have to let go in order to focus on the important things in life. it's definitley not easy and i've had some ugly cries myself.

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