Monday, April 28, 2014

Mom Face

On Saturday night, Jason was working late and I was home with Kenley. I was giving her a bath and we were having a great little mother/daughter night at home when out of nowhere Bailey started barking out of control. Bailey has a tendency to do this at every little noise when I'm home without Jason. The barking scared Kenley so she tried to launch herself out of the tub and in to my arms, but instead, slipped and hit her chin on the tub. She immediately started to do the terrified scream cry - ya know the one where their face is bright red and their mouth is wide open but NO sound is coming out? I pulled her out of the tub and then I saw it....I saw my baby's blood. 

The poor thing bit her lip when she slipped and was bleeding everywhere. All over her face, the towel, me. It was at this moment I had to put on my mom face. Me freaking out wasn't going to do either of us any good. So I stayed calm, comforted my baby, cleaned her up, attempted to hold an ice cube to her lip, and eventually got her to stop crying and snuggle in my arms. 
Once my girl was sleeping soundly in her bed, I came downstairs, opened a bottle of wine and started sobbing. I knew she was fine. I knew the injury was minor but seeing my baby so scared, seeing her blood, that was a first for me and I hated it. I called Jason and texted my mom and they both made me feel better as I knew they would. But I realized that Saturday night was the first of MANY nights to come, nights where my baby is hurt or sick or heartbroken or scared. I want so badly to shield her from the world so no harm can come to her. I know shut-ins are a little weird...but she'd be a cute weirdo. 

But seriously, how is my heart supposed to take this? How am I supposed to let her get hurt so she learns? Or teach her to face her fears when I'm sure I'll just want to hold her tight in my arms? Or let some douchebag little boy break her heart without going to his house and kneeing him where it counts?





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22 comments:

Jess Beer said...

Poor girl! I know EXACTLY the cry you're talking about! It's so hard when they bump themselves or get upset...but these are all only the first of many. You're strong and I know she can count on you to keep the mom face...and kick those boys' butts if needed :)

Jessica said...

Oh my goodness, this post made me so emotional. I know just how you feel. I wonder about the same exact things. And cry just thinking about a day when my little man is too big for me to hold and protect. Ugh. I'll be a mess when that day comes. The good news is that we only have to take it one day at a time. One day at a time is a lot easier to fathom than years from now. Let's just hope that the time goes slow!

Heather Leigh @ Like a Morning cup of coffee said...

I feel you girl!! I still remember my girl's first blood everywhere boo boo and I wish had acted as calm as you did!

Bridget said...

This made me so emotional also! I often think about Turner when he's older and if he will be accepted. Will he be bullied? I don't want him to ever feel any type of pain. I think we would have adorable shielded weirdos... :) I totally laughed at the end when you talked about kneeing a boy where it counts if he ever hurt Kenley...hahaha.

~Dawn~ said...

Being a little further along into motherhood, I've experienced so much hurt, boo-boo's and heartbreak with my girls already - everything from cuts and scrapes, broken bones and even broken hearts...yes, 3rd graders can be MEAN!! :( You are such a good Mom, Kristen, but things like this are going to happen beyond your control. Your little girls knows you love her and are always there to help kiss the wounds goodbye.

Kari said...

Hopefully she won't have a broken heart from a boy- Colin will be a very nice boyfriend :)

Katie @ yellowmangolife.blogspot.com said...

Girl, I swear it can be the smallest amount of blood or a blood bath and I would freak out the same. Seriously can't stand seeing my baby bleed or hurt. It's the worst! Look at you being so great and keeping strong for her

Carolyn said...

OMG! Poor Kenny! :( glad she's ok! Mom face is so hard sometimes! And don't worry about her getting her heart broken - I'm training Weston early to treat Kenny right. HAHAHA!

Nat said...

Poor Kenley! Being a mom is tough sometimes! This post made me tear up- I hate thinking about the day my little guy grows up and I can't protect him anymore :(

Erin LFF said...

Aww, poor Kenley! Lucky girl has a GREAT mom to fix everything though :)

Erica M. said...

You poor girls! I hope your both doing better. I had a similar thing happen with my son, the first time he fell and bit his lip. It was horrible.

WinterBenson said...

Aww! Poor baby girl!

If you figure out the answer to those questions, please let me know...other than putting our mom faces on and dealing with it...such is life I suppose...

Courtney B said...

Oh mama.... I am SO sorry!! You handled it so well! It's amazing how much the blood, pain and tears affects us! Mia fell of a picnic table last week (first hitting the bench and then landing on the concrete) and the feelings I experienced during that are pretty indescribable. Of course I said every swear word known to man, moved faster than I ever have in my life, and held her closer than ever before... but I wanted to cry at the same exact moment I knew I needed to be brave for Mia. She got over it quickly but my stomach still churns when I think of that moment, ugh!

Anonymous said...

Good job mama! Now little Mou knows that you will be there to comfort when needed and she will also see you step back when needed. That is the hard one.
I am thankful that Kenley has such good parents to do both.
xo m

Jenny said...

OMG Callie fell and bit her lip just a week ago and it took everything for me to keep my shit together and my hubby was even home! I totally feel you pain! Good for you having that glass of wine! Hugs my friend! This mom this doesn't really get easier does it? :)

Ashley @ Life on the Parsons Farm said...

Oh that is awful. I am so sorry that that happened.

atparsons.blogspot.com

Angie said...

My daughter (oldest) is now almost sixteen. It gets harder and harder, trust me. We just have to keep the mom face on though, it's our job.

Ashleigh said...

Bless her little heart & yours too! I am sure you had a mini heart attack right? Lord knows I would have! I'm glad she is alright minus her poor little lip!

Amanda said...

Poor Kenley!!! Poor mama!!! Their boo boos are the worst :/ Sloan juuuust had the same thing happen - the dog barked and he went running and slipped in a rug in our hallway and he bit his tongue and his chin was all busted open - poor babe was crying for what seemed like hours! Glad she's feeling better and you did the right thing by staying calm -them seeing you freak makes it worse!!!

ajs {of MN} said...

awwweee now the dinner, wine and dirty dancing makes so much sense!!!

sorry you had to already do this. i remember the EXACT day and moment i also had to put on my mom face, i remember thinking in an instant:

"andrea, dont freak out, avrie cant see you freak out... be calm!"

and i was, momma fixes everything!

J and A said...

Awe poor girl. You are such a good mama!! I don't want to think of the day this happens to us. I'll be like you!!

AllThingsYummy said...

Oh I know just how you feel. I've called my husband crying when my little girl hurt herself. She was over it long before I was.