At some point yesterday, when looking at the calender, it hit me that March 2nd was the day I found out I was pregnant with Kenley. I will never forget how terrified I was, how shocked I was and how unprepared I felt. And, yet, at the same time it was that exact moment that I became a mom. My life completely and totally changed in that one instant.
There truly are no words that adequately describe what it is like to be a mom. It's something that is only felt in the deepest part of your heart. I will never be able to put on paper what I feel when I look at my little girl.
Being Kenley's mom is the reason I was put on this planet. I look at her and cannot believe how beautiful she is, how smart she has become and that I created her. I look at her little feet and can hardly believe they are the same ones that pushed up in to my ribs and literally took my breath on several occasions.
The other day, out of nowhere, Kenley gave me a hug and said "You a real dood mommy." I nearly passed out as my heart exploded into a thousand pieces. Being a good mom is something that can't be defined and yet is all we strive for as mothers. I worry every day if I am saying the right things in the right ways, teaching Kenley how I ought to be teaching her, if I am doing the right things at the right time. All I can really do is follow my gut and try my best. Seeing my little girl happy and healthy is the only way to measure my success as a mom and for now, it seems I am doing a good job.